Elliot The Elephant

     Elliot the Elephant. He's become my new companion. There's a story behind this little guy, and by golly you're gonna want to hear this. A few weeks ago my Grandma and I went shopping. I found this elephant for $2.00. So I carried him around so I could buy him. Well I blacked out on the ground and the clerk was the first one to find me. Well she and my Grandma started yelling at each other about whether or not to call 911. When I woke up the lady was pinning me down against the floor. I told her to get off of me and let me go, but she just held me down tighter. So with out a second thought I took the elephant that was still in my hand and I smacked her across the face with it.. she let go of me. I handed her three dollars from my purse and walked out.
     Elliot has been by my side every step of the way since then. When I come out of these episodes I'm scared, I'll admit to it. Especially when there are people I don't know involved. Elliot has protected me once by getting the lady to get off of me, in my mind he can do it again. It's sad I know. I'm 17 years old I shouldn't be so dependent on the stuffed animal. But he's been there. Last Tuesday I had what they classify as a grand mal seizure. What I would call a time to just call it quits. I woke up and my brother was the only one home so he called my grandparents. Why he didn't call 911 I will never know. But it was bad. Elliot the elephant was the only thing that could calm me down enough to talk my brother through what to do it it happened again. And it did. It was a bad night and the elephant was with me the whole time. I call that friendship. I'm going back to the neurologist tomorrow to see what to do next, but until than Elliot the elephant and I will be keeping close to cushioned ground because having a full on seizure hurts your head.. just take my word for it. So what makes you feel safe?

Keep your head up and I highly recommend not smacking anyone with a stuffed animal they tend to not appreciate that,
Ellie <3

And just for your video enjoyment... :D Enjoy.

Heck Yeah I did!

     I've had a few good days lately. Sure, I'm still blacking out, sure I'm still frustrated, but by golly I've had a couple "heck yeah!" moments this week. Starting with Thursday.
~Wednesday I had my first seizure free day in one whole month! "Heck yeah I was!"
~Thursday I had my first few blackouts at school, but my teachers and I handled it quite beautifully and none of us freaked out. "Heck yeah we did!"

     On Thursday afternoon my mom and I left for Wyoming to go visit some family members of ours. She does cranial therapy which quite honestly I still don't understand, but it was supposed to help and I'm kinda grasping at straws here so I went. He is a highway patrol officer who was a paramedic before. It was an interesting weekend.

Race Day 

~Well I made it the eight hour trip. "Heck yeah I did!"
~I ran a 5k with out blacking out in the middle of the road. "Double heck yeah I did!
~Woke up at 4:30 am with a blood sugar of 45 and got it back in range with in 30 mins. and woke up with a 95 the next morning. "Heck yeah I did!"
 I also thought I would share some other interesting findings with you.. So this weekend I was just kinda chilling and I blacked out. Well after they found me 15-20 minutes later I went and sat down and I was just like super dizzy. So he decided to check my vitals just to see if we could find anything. So he checked my pupils they responded fine I guess (I don't really know what that necessarily means but I guess it's a good thing.) Anyways, and then he checked my blood pressure, I don't remember what it was, but I don't think it was anywhere out of the ordinary. And then he was just kinda checking my pulse and I blacked out. When I woke up he said that he could feel it happening because my pulse just kinda disappeared. He said it was fine it was staying normal and then all of a sudden it was gone. Just like that, gone. Just for a few seconds and then when I started convulsing like I normally do it came back. The frustrating part is my EKG and echos come back normal every time. Wouldn't they show that? So after this whole glucose this we are for sure going back to the cardiologist and getting me on a Holter Monitor or what ever that's called because by golly that's just weird... and not normal. So yeah that happened.

     Today I also had a endocrinologist appointment with a different endo than the one I went to a few years back.
~Got a CGM put on for three days and have actually kept the food log up to date for more than three hours. "Heck yeah I did!"
    ~Trying to upload the picture of the CGM is gonna be a "heck no I can't", but if you follow me on instagram or twitter I posted it.

    Lately I've discovered that it's good to let yourself celebrate the positives. Because it's not the negatives or the positives that define you. It's how you handle what it thrown your way. What were your wins this week?

Keep your head up and celebrate the positives,
Ellie <3

Another Story For The Books

     This school year I decided to do online schooling as it just was more flexible with all my episodes, doctors appointments, and other stuff. But I also go for one hour a day to my old school to participate in color guard. Today was my third day doing this and because of today's events... probably my last for a while. I got there a few minutes early so I used this free time to use the restroom when I was finished I set my backpack down so I could get out my phone. That was the last thing I remember. I woke up to the school nurse, two campus monitors, the school police, the dean, and a math teacher surrounding me yelling things into radios, shaking me trying to get me to answer questions I'm 100% sure a few seconds after that I went back into another tweaking sesh because the next time I woke up the fire department was prepping me for an IV and setting me up on oxygen. Then for a third time I fell back into the darkness of a seizure. From what people told me they started me on the anti-seizure stuff in my IV and finger popped me out of it (there's a pressure point that causes pain which I respond to and wake up). I remember waking up and ripping the oxygen tube thing out of my nose and they also said I wasn't cooperating, well I had good reason it kind of scares a person to wake up with a needle in their arm, tubes in their nose, and people yelling at them to "stay with me, keep your eyes open, talk to me sweetie...". I finally calmed down and let them do their thing. I don't know what stuff they put in my IV because I was soo loopy it wasn't even funny. Unfortunately I had to go to ER because well, I'm not really sure why but they told my mom we had no choice. So they lifted me up on the gurney and wheeled me out... in the middle of first lunch... with over 200 kids staring at me... and I probably looking stoned as heck because like I said the drugs made me so loopy. They took me to the ER and discharged me with in two hours with no new news. But that's not even the fun part. My best friend texted me asking how I was feeling. I asked her how she knew her response: "I heard you O.D in the girls bathroom." Yes folks there is now a rumor going around that school that a girl O.D in the girls bathroom and had to be taken to the hospital. The fun part is the girl they're talking about is me. She had heard about it and asked her sister who has first lunch what happened and her sister told her that "Elizabeth must of had an episode in the bathroom and was taken to the hospital" So yea... I can now check over dosing in the girls bathroom off my list and I didn't even actually do it. As to how I feel about the rumors I'm not really sure. I find it funny right now because I know what happened and it's funny that kids can take a seizure and turn it into overdose in a matter of 30 minutes and I'm sure it will get annoying soon if my parents let me go back to guard because I'll have to answer questions and be pegged as a druggie and I don't even go to that school anymore. I guess this is just another bump in the road. :)

Keep your head up and DO NOT overdose in the girls bathroom,
Ellie <3

Partners In Crime

This is my best friend:

She's the bestest friend a person could ever ask for. She's always there to make you smile when nothing goes the way it should. She and I are polar opposites yet exactly alike all at the same time. She's knows what to do when I fall and how to pick me back up again, both mentally and medically wise. And she's got the most amazing personality. She's my best friend.

This is her and I camping:

                               

We decided to go camping one weekend. Our parents okayed us going out alone, although I'm pretty sure my father was on top of a mountain watching up all night. It might have taken us 45 minutes to start a fire and we might have gone to bed at nine, but it was fun. And being with your best friend means having fun just means more memories to last forever.

We've also done a few dangerous stunts:

We were breathing fire out of our mouths, but we were using corn starch, NOT ALCOHOL!! Just thought I'd throw that out there. 

Now, we of coarse did this with the supervision of my parents and the permission of her parents. But she is a thrill seeker and I don't think I would have stepped outside of my comfort zone if it wasn't for her willingness to torch her eyebrows, I say that in the most figurative way.

She's my best friend and I don't know what I would do with out her. She's ran from one end of the school to the other to get a wheel chair for me because I was about to pass out, she's stayed up countless nights with me because my blood sugar was to low to fall asleep, she's my bestest friend in the entire world and I would be me without her. And I wouldn't hesitate to return any of the favors she done for me. We're two peas in a pod who hate high school and love playing with fire, we're inseparable. She's my partner in crime and I just wanted to tell her thanks and maybe remind you to tell whoever your partner in crime maybe the the same thing.

Keep your head up and breathe fire,
Ellie <3

This Post Doesn't Really Have a Title..

     I have an English project I have to do. I have to use the fact that I am an out-of-the-box thinker and I have to describe how it feels to be me, but it can't be an essay and a video is to cliche and my friend Sully is already doing something with glitter paper and we all know you can't have two people using glitter paper on the same project. So now I have to think of something very creative and out-of-the-boxy. Normally I'm really good at thinking up projects but I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing for this one, which is truly no bueno situation. Any suggestions like at all?? Because this is a really BIG project and I kinda need a good grade on it.

Keep your head up and your grades up as well,
Ellie <3

P.S while you're helping me with my homework find the humor in this pictures, because really there is a lot of humor. :D

    

   one more because you know you want too..


So maybe not all of them were "funny" persay, but they did make you smile. :)

The Polar Express

     The holidays have always been my favorite. My family has so many traditions that you can't help but smile at. One of them is going to the Polar Express in Ely, Nevada the first weekend of December EVERY year. This year we had a group of 23 that met up and dominated the small town all weekend. It was fantastic. Here are just a few pictures from the weekend, more may come soon. I hope you enjoy the laugh. :D 

These are all the "kids" that were with us at the Ely craft fair. The oldest Patrick pointing at Santa was trying to tickle him, Santa wasn't to thrilled with that though. 

This is Victoria, Taylir, and I waiting to get on the train to go to the North Pole! 

This is my Father's Maybelline look as he calls it and a creepy statue behind him, I mean look at the smile on that guy it horrible.  

Cutting down our Christmas tree in the fridged cold... 

Some family members and I :) If you look at the girl in the yellow we have matching PJ's cheapest  pj's I've ever bought. 

Our Christmas card picture this year. Aren't we adorable?

The Polar Express is part of our Christmas tradition, what are some of yours? Merry Christmas season everyone! Keep your head up and the Christmas spirit alive,

Ellie <3

I don't Think You Know

   
     I was sitting dying on the floor at a Hunger Games themed birthday party... We just played around of nonviolent Hunger Games and I was hot, sweaty, sticky, tired, and low. I have been all week. Ever since Wednesday when I dropped into the 20's at school again. It's been kicking my butt lately. But anyways, I was laying on the floor under the AC trying to catch my breath and regain stability in my legs. As I was laying there a lady appeared probably from somewhere, but I swear she poofed out of nowhere. She asked me if I was alright and I said yes just a little tired from running haywire in the sun. She got really close to my face, maybe even a little to close, and whispered "it's okay I know what you're going through." Ummm okay?? I turned to her and asked "what do you think is wrong?" I was trying to be respectful be polite, but it really just wasn't happening. "Oh you know it's not a party you are throwing and you're not the main person and you're feeling left out. It's okay, I may not agree with how you're feeling, but I understand." Umm NO YOU DON'T!! I didn't say that of course, that would be rude, but seriously I've never met you before and this is one of the first things you say to me? Really? "I'm actually laying here alone and not outside with the rest of the party because I feel like I am about to pass out, and my blood sugar is low and I just need to sit out for a few." I said nicely, quietly, discreetly. She wasn't going for it. "Oh I know how that feels too, I watched a show on TV and one of the characters was diabetic." At this point I had lost all level headedness. Oh no, I was about to blow. "I'm sorry, but watching a TV show doesn't even begin to tell you what I'm going through right now." She kept talking but I tuned her out. I was done with the conversation, she wasn't getting anything I explained it was for the better that I stopped talking. I've since been thinking.. there's a lot of people who don't understand.
-I try so hard to participate in party games, but with a blood sugar of 40 that's just not an option.
-I can't see ANYTHING when I am low, the vision just isn't there.
-my attitude goes right out the window I'm a lifeless corpse waiting for something to happen so I can be functional again.
- The anxiety attacks that I have become familiar with after a low makes me cry, shake, freak out and I've learned that leaving the room is my best option.
People don't understand that I can't control what happens when I'm low, I have no power against my body... and it sucks. When your day starts off at exactly 100 and then at 1:30 you're 79 and then at 3:00 you're 42 and then you're 90 at 4:30 and back to 50 in 20 minutes you just want to scream. You can't control it and no most of the times people don't understand this. It's beyond frustrating that I have to deal with these lows and the anxiety and I am trying SOO hard to better control my blood sugars and to be healthy people just don't understand this.
Keep your head up and it screwed on tight,
Ellie <3

The Art Of Going To The Store For One Thing And Coming Back With Four Other Things

"Moooooom I don't feel good." I said as I laid down with my cheek against the kitchen tile.
"What's your sugar?" She asked only half paying attention.
"Do I look like I care what my number is right now? I told you I don't feel good." I huffed laying my head back down.
"Go check, I think it might be useful." *unzip the ugly a$$ black pouch, slip strip into slot, poke finger, flinch because you hit a weird spot on your finger, wait for the five seconds to be up.* 66.

See that grey dot? Yes, that would be where I pricked today.. -_- 

"Mom I'm almost out of strips and I've got a lot going on this week." I huff again except this time while drinking juice.
"Maybe after you eat your dinner you can go get yourself some." She said half sarcastically. So after dinner I got my butt up to go get more strips from Target. I walk straight over to the pharmacy... I mean of course they were closed it's labor day, I really should have thought that one through. But, then I thought crossed my mind. I'll get some ice cream. So I walked to the back of the store and grabbed some ice cream, and then as I was walking back up to the front I remember "oh silly me I need a toothbrush because I acentically threw mine away this morning." So now I have ice cream and a tooth brush then just as I was about to check out I decided I needed an Itunes card because Fun. had a new song out that I NEEDED to get. So now I have ice cream, a tooth brush, an Itunes card, a pack of gum, and NO STRIPS!! Hmm I suck at being a one track minded person. This is why I don't go to Target with money.

Keep your head up and your tooth brushes OUT OF THE TRASHCAN,
Ellie <3

P.S I found this on Facebook today because Lord knows I'm not addicted to that.. I though I would share it with y'all because really it's quite funny.

Yup, you know you wanna smile now. :) Have a good short week everyone!!

The Uphill Battle And The Bloopers In Life

     Today's post will be a multiple posts in one post, post. Does that make sense??? No one? ookay then never mind. 

     Summer is such an easy going time of the year. You're done with school, you can hang out, eat when ever you need to, go places when ever you need to, it's all fun and games until the school years starts. I've started my countdown.We only have 7 days left of Summer. This is both exciting and completely unnerving. I'm excited to get back to the new school year, I'm excited to see my friends and start up marching season. But with all of that comes the constant flow of math, and numbers, and carb counts, and purchasing of frosting for me and the nurse, and getting last minute orders faxed in from the doctor, and packing snacks and guesstimating my schedule based on last year's events. I'm excited, but worried. What would you call that exerried? (Nevermind erase that horrible word from your memory.) The beginning of the school year is always such an uphill battle. It's always me and my body fighting against the rest of the world. And although there are other people who are going through the same thing, maybe even worse, none of my family knows what it's like to go through this every.. single.. year. So I'll start this school year with my head held high and my bg completely out of whack and I will conquer.

     Oh hey. It turns out I'm allergic to freakin cinnamon!!!!!!!!!!!!  I found this out the other night while making cookies, amazing cookies might I add and when I was finished I, like always, licked the bowl.(I mean who doesn't right?) Anyway I haven't made this type of cookie in a few years so I licked a lot of the bowl because it was good. And then my tongue started itching, and then a few minutes later my eyes started watering, and you could just start to see my tongue swelling just a bit, but I didn't think much of it. Until my breathing became shallow and my throat started feeling like it was closing in. *caugh caugh* still couldn't breath, throat still feeling like it was closing. Maybe you should go take a benedrill, my mother told me.But see I can't swallow pills so I stayed put until she shoved it down my still closing throat. Soo umm I guess I'm allergic to cinnamon now..

     Sometimes life is all about letting go and trying new things. Like not worrying or just not caring (unless it's important than you should care.) You see that girl behind me. Her name is TooClazzy. Okay that's not her name, but ya'll don't really need to know it. Anyway she's one of my besties who has a great sense of humor. She always made fun of my new product Dex4. I bought it one day while shopping and decided it might come in useful for band camp. Today it did. On the bottle it says boosts lows fast and boosts energy. Well, I was low... like very low and when you're that low you tend to get picky about food (or at least I do). So when I was sitting on the field with a 38 I opened up the bottle and began to sip, it wasn't that it tasted bad, it just didn't taste like I wanted it to at that moment so I went back to my juice box. Well TooClazzy came over and was like hey that boosts energy? Can I have the rest? And I was like I really don't care. She thought it was the greatest thing EVER. It was seriously funny and made me laugh which is good when you're chillin at a 38 in the middle of 110 degree whether OUTSIDE!!

What ever happens...
always keep your head up and your smile on (and if you're me... stay away from cinnamon),
Ellie <3

Win For Elizabeth!

   
     Improve, thinking on your feet, witty, sarcastic, rude... I don't care what you call it we've all had those amazing one liners that you came up with quickly as come backs. Today mine is worth sharing. After kettlebells my mother texted me asking me to pick up some ice cream on my way home. I stopped at the store and because I drive a bigger truck I parked in the back. It was a well lit parking lot and there were plenty of people coming in and out I didn't feel unsafe or anything so I continued on my mission for ice cream. Coming out of the store I looked around. There was me, an elderly man and a very large group of teenage boys walking my direction. I got out my keys and headed straight towards my truck. The large group of boys kept walking towards me and now I could hear what they were saying. They were making comments back and forth about me, and how hot I was... all while I was thinking of ways to kick their asses should anything go wrong. Just as I was opening my door one of the boys got a little closer, not close enough for me to feel threatened, just close enough for it to be creepy, and he said directed at me "why don't you come and get some." Right then I responded "you wish." with a tiny bit of well must I say B*!%^yness to it. I then proceeded to get in my car and drive away smirking as they all stood there in the middle of the parking lot with their jaws on the ground. And that my friends is Elizabeth's win for the night. :) So what is the lesson of this story?
To always have your snarky one liners ready... you'll never know when you may need them.

Keep your head up and your comebacks ready,
Ellie <3

Party At My Place

   
     Today is my first day of work. Not volunteering, not helping my grandma and getting payed. Working. Being on a pay-roll, having to show up on time, you know the drill. My hours are great, I work from one in the afternoon until six at night. This way I have plenty of time in the mornings to hang out with my brother and do summery type things and then I have time at night to still make it to my new Kettlebells class at 7:15. It works for me. But what this also means is an earlier lunch, limited snack times for me, and a much later dinner. There is also not an onsite nurse that I can consult with if I ever become very low or just feel "off". Granted, I am working at a preschool so the kids will have a snack time that I will be able to sneak in some extra carbs, but I will be working in the play area/ gym. Which means stress overload and playing with kids. Which also means I will need twice as many fast acting carbs and a few more grams of protein to cover it all. Now I just feel like I'm already running in circles. So needless to say.. I'm nervous.
     It also really doesn't help that last night around 2:00 AM my blood sugar decided it was going to be a great time to go deep sea scuba diving and never come back up. So just like I do in the day time with a bg of 40 I did at night. Except, I was still half asleep. Right in the middle of a partying type dream. My best friends were all wasted and I was the only one sober (good for me!). Until I found the bottle of apple juice. So I was up for an hour and half doing juice box shots, rocking out to my ipod (quietly, normal people aren't up this hour) and pricking my finger every half hour or so. Yup. That was my night. Now I feel hung over and very slow to want to face the challenges of a new job this afternoon.
I. Will. Make. It.

Keep your head up and your mind open,
Ellie <3

Getting Through April

April. Not even half way over and I've already done so much. It started off busy and out of town, leading into my glucose tolerance testing (which all came back wonderful so I guess I'm a medical mystery??) Which is when we took a mini field trip to the new Hoover Dam bypass bridge, which is about and hour away from my house. 

In between Arizona and Nevada. 

Back on the Nevada side. 

If you can see him, he's a big horn sheep down by the water. 

 Then came Elizabeth Keane Day. When I received my big Prudential Spirit Of Community award in 2010 the city counsel dedicated April 7th as Elizabeth Keane Day. It was only April 7, 2010, but we like to celebrate it every year... WITH CAKE!!!

 Then came Easter. As always we have a HUGE Easter party with AMAZING food after church, and boy was it delicious!!

Hiding Easter eggs! 

The Easter egg finders. The hat on my head doubled as an
Easter egg basket as I was to lazy to go and find a real one.

 Next came the TourDeCure! I was soo excited to be riding in the 15mile ride. It was super rainy and cold in Vegas that day, and it was a little annoying because it NEVER rains in Vegas and it just decides today is a great day to poor. But, luckily the rain held out and it was beautiful riding weather! It was also really cool to meet people who had diabetes, I've never seen so many insulin pumps and people checking their blood sugar in one place. And it was neat to be able to encourage them in their fight.

Hoola-hooping before the ride. 

At the starting line. That's my nervous smile. 

Off we go! 

Coming up to the rest stop after a super long hill! 

Power drinking water so I could finish the last 7 miles! 

After the rest stop up the next part of the big hill! 

Coming up to the finish line and passing the big red truck.

Crossing the finish line!!
Huge smiles all the way!!! 

Meeting Monica Jackson the Fox 5 news anchor and telling
her I saw her commercial for this even and that's what made me
decide to sign up and ride. 

Doing a sound byte for the Monday morning news on why I decided
to ride and why I was so crazy for not having any training and just
doing it. 

The celebratory Outback lunch. 

It was amazing!!

That rounds out the first half of April. Now we're at the final stretch of school, I get my licsence in a month and turn 16, start my summer job, and more! I'm so excited. Hope your April is filled with laughs and great numbers.

Keep your head up and push on,
Ellie <3