Conversations That I Ponder LOONG After They're Over

I'm really stupid. I just am. Sometimes my conversations with people are so random or stupid or to any other normal person they would just seem off the wall, that some of them leave me thinking. And I've decided I'm going to share some of those conversations with you and maybe we can ponder them together?

Today In chem:
Me:what did we do yesterday??
Her: Weren't you here yesterday?
Me:Physically yes... mentally no.

-Random yes. Insane yes. True? Yes.

Today with my designated if I fall on the floor you're the only one besides the nurse who knows how to properly save me person: (on the football field during the hard lock down drill)
Her: Where is your emergency bag? Aren't you supposed to have it on you during these types of things?
Me: At home on my bed.
Her: Don't you to ALWAYS bring it.
Me: Yes.
Her: So why isn't it here?
Me: Because it was tired and needed to sleep in thus making it late for school and then it just didn't have a ride so it stayed home.
Her: You're stupid. But I love you... so don't die.
Me: Got it.

-true story.

Yesterday while while correcting a low with gummy bears:
Her: You're not supposed to be eating that.
Me: And you're not supposed to be annoying and yet, here you are (I'm grouchy when I'm low)
Her: I think I should take that from you.
Me: And right now I think you should shove it... (I was called away from the conversation probably for the better too.)

-true? Yes. Would I have finished my sentence? The world may never know...

Keep your head up and your conversations level headed,
Ellie <3

You Know You've Had A Great Weekend When...

-You can go out for two hours on a quad and people could care less about where you are.
-You don't ride with gloves so you get blisters on both your thumbs from gassing and breaking
-You get an ugly tan from the band-aids you put over the blisters on your thumbs
-You get in the back of a jeep to go pick up part of your group that ran out of gas and end up scaling mountains
-You put your life in the hands of a ten year old driving your quad that's 4 times bigger than her
-You have to reach over her to break abruptly because your brother cut you off
-When a random guy rides up telling you 1/2 of your group is walking back to camp five miles away because they ran out of gas and you have to internally debate on going and helping them or just leaving them to walk.
-When your mom forces you to eat a smore because you're low and she doesn't want to put up with your attitude any longer.
When you're grandma won't speak to you because you're covered in dirt.
-When your brother who left with a green shirt on comes back painted beige with dirt because he does not know how to drive slow.
-When your father has to come rescue you and your mother and you hiked to far up the mountain and really don't want to walk all the way back.
-When you get out of the truck back at home and have to walk like an old man to the house because you're so sore from riding.

Keep your head up and your amazing weekends coming,
Ellie <3

Time Ticks By...

There was a low. 52. It's low, but ya know I've walked home in the 30's before... don't remember half of it and I think I've passed out, but a 52 I can handle. I ate a tootsie roll 5 minutes before my stop, and a juice box to make double sure I was on the up and up as I left the bus to walk home. A block away from my house my toes started tingling. I retested 50. Obviously the juice box was not helping what so ever and I might as well have just skipped the tootsie roll because that had no effect either. So there I was on the side of the road left to ponder how I was going to handle this one. I wasn't scared like I've said, I've walked home lower. It was just weird how I can bring a 40 up in less than ten minutes with a juice box and a smarties and my 52 wasn't budging it was actually going in the opposite direction. So I debated, in my head of course which plan of action I was going to take. I went back to my ratios. 15:10. 80-50= 30, 30/15=2. I needed two 15 carb snacks rather soon. (Yes, I am rather good at math in my head when I'm low. Rather surprising actually.) So I dug out two more tootsie rolls. 14 carbs each, 14+14=28, meeh close enough. So I eat they were delicious btw. I get home, yes I made it home don't act all surprised. Retested. For sure I'll be busting through 90's maybe even breaking into the low 100's. Not even close. 59. Well crap this kinda sucks. Now the head ache was setting in. Uhg. I throw some spaghetti o's into a bowl and almost punched the microwave. Needless to say, I was a little frustrated. I shoved them into my mouth and waited the 15 minutes. 64. By now it was almost 2:45, my first check was at 1:30. Okay I have at least 80 carbs into my system maybe I can just ride this one out. 30 minutes later my riding at a 69. Well for the love of God will my body just do its job so I can get on with my life. A juice box and 2 oreos later I'm sitting steady at 94. I'll take it. 3 and a half hours later I'm slowly getting over the low hangover and moving on. It's just frustrating.

Keep your head up and level headed,
Ellie <3

Reflection Time With Ellie

Today was one of those days where it was amazing and horrible all at the same time. Here is just some of the knowledge I acquired today that I'm going to share with you.

1. When you get a new meter there's only going to be two people who share that joy with you; your designated medical helper (Sully) because now she doesn't have to worry about me, and the person who is like your brother and he only got excited about it because I was excited. (more on the new meter to come)

2. When you fall asleep in the band room during lunch set an alarm to make sure you get a chance to eat or else you will be low and hungry the rest of the freakin afternoon.

3. I lie. Unless your name starts with an M, I'm going to straight up lie to you about how I'm feeling. If I'm a half asleep, drunk looking, hungry, doubled over maniac there's obviously something wrong. I'm a really good hider. I can be 52 and say everything is fine with a smile on my face but look completely drunk. And people believe me!! If you have to ask if I'm okay or not the likely hood of it is I'm not.

4. Stay positive. Friday is here.

Keep your head up and your positivity present,
Ellie <3

I'll Admit It... I'm Scared.

A few weeks ago I tore tissue in my wrist and sprained it. A week later I finally got to take off the brace and a week and a half later I was back in guard. Well, the way I hurt my wrist was we had to toss the flag bend down touch the floor, come back up and catch that stupid flag. It did not work for me. Now that I'm back doing flag work and I have regained my muscle back I have to reattempt that stupid toss. And it scares the living daylights out of me. I'm so nervous about what if it happens again. So I spent all 5th period getting yelled at because I couldn't toss that toss right. So now I'm scared and annoyed and I wanted to share that all with you.

Keep your head up and your tosses caught,
Ellie <3

The Story Of My Life

This is me when I was just a wii tot 15 years ago, chilling out with my aunt in my Grandparent's back yard.

This is me now. Almost 16, almost driving, and still alive. 

This is me acting like I'm working. Yes, I slack off like any other 15 year old too.

This is me chillin with my homies and my brother in very very cold weather.

You know everyone hangs out on a horse swing. No? That's just me??

                                                   

I got really really dizzy...

This is me being a fun entergetic person with out a care in the world with people I love.

 I didn't show you my life story because I wanted your sympathy or I just wanted to show you how aweosme I am. I wanted to show you so you understand if you don't go through this and to give hope if you are. You're as beautiful as anyone else if you have hypoglycemia you're as entergetic as anyone else even if you have to test your blood sugar and your just as cool if you have to drink a juice box in the middle of math (maybe even cooler.) You're you don't let anyone take that away from you. And for your nightly laugh: this totally describes me.

Keep your head up and stay you,
Ellie <3

Ground Rules And Assigned Seats

Friday night: I fell a sleep on the bus because well let's face it, I was tired. I guess what I didn't realize is that I was low... really low... like scary low. Some one woke me up when we got to my stop, but I couldn't really figure out where I was and I didn't know how to get home. And that's all I remember, I also remember waking up laying face first on the ground with a juice box in my hand and the bagel bite box on the counter (another story for a later date.) Those kinds of things scare me when I'm completely oblivious to what's really going on around me. I happened to let it slip when I got on the bus this after noon to a friend who made sure to tell the bus driver who in turn gave me an assigned seat at the very front so she could keep an eye on me. Hey as long as I get to sit next to the window I'm fine. But now there are more ground rules in place in my life now and it gets hard to keep track of them all. Like now if I feel low I'm aloud to hang out on the bus at the bus stop until I'm high enough to safely make it home. Which is cool, I can do that. But, there's a problem half the time I don't "feel" low. I used to test before I got off the bus to catch some of those lows, but with the cost of test strips and the fact that technically I'm not "required" to test testing just kinda became irregular. So I'm setting ground rules for myself. To prevent things like Friday night from happening and to just help every one else around me feel secure. I hate when people are hovering over me when I test and stuff, but I guess it's for the better. So I'm setting ground rules some other people have set for me like the nurse and other people and some I'm setting myself. Either way, they're being set and I'm just going to have to get over it and move on.

Keep your head up and your ground rules set,
Ellie <3